Well, I Bet That You'd Look Good On The Dancefloor

It's 2.15pm. Last night was pretty ace. I had a good night. I'm now in my room, doing this, as well as updating my iPod and studying. I also just finished the book Skinny. Definantely worth reading. The end is...just wow. Read it, if only for the end. The book is somewhat gruesome at times, but it gives a good look into the lives of both a sufferer and the sibling of a sufferer of anorexia.

I've probably had about 200 calories so far today. I know I said that I wouldn't count and all that jazz, but it just sort of happens. It's only really been a couple vita-grains, an icy-pole, diet pepsi, and gum, so that's good. I saw the peanut butter in the cupboard when I was downstairs and made myself return to my room. I was quite proud of myself.

I also just texted my aunty. I'm trying to convince her to let me hang out with her kids during the week for a couple hours while she goes out and shops or runs errands. I really love hanging out with them. She has two children: a 4 year old boy, and a nearly 2 year old girl. They're wonderful. They love me so much, and when I go over, both stutter over their words because they're so excited and have a million things to say to me. We do drawings and play with dinosaurs and puzzles and read books. Sometimes I chase them around the house, and give them lollies, or we have shouting contests. When I'm with them, I totally forget about all the bad stuff in my life. I don't think about eating or anything like that either. I also get a lot of exercise running after them, especially the boy.

Mmm, someone is making toast downstairs. I love the smell of toast. It reminds me of coming down in the mornings when I was a child and my dad was making toast for his breakfast. I was so happy and innocent back then.

On that note, I still can't believe how confident I felt last night. I was wearing my jeans, and my legs were hardly touching. My hair also went the way I wanted it to. While I'm usually more reserved, I was up and dancing with everyone and singing and being loud. It was wonderful. I love getting lost in the music.

Okay, I should go study some more. I'll update when I find out if my aunty thinks it would be an awesome idea. I really hope that she does.

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Okay, it's 10.15pm, and all went well with asking my aunty to hang out. Hopefully I should be there this week some time. That would be awesome. Right now, my cramps are eating me alive, and today, I probably had about 1100 cals, maybe less. Some vita-grains, icy pole, roll, and a chicken burger. I also had some pastry and cheese sauce (I made a lasagne!) so we'll make that 1500. I'm going to weigh myself tomorrow morning - oh no! - and while I assume I haven't lost, I really don't want to see a gain. Although I'm pretty sure that I will.

My fish are chasing each other around in the tank. It's quite horrible watching that, actually. I feel kind of helpless. I wish I could stop one fish from biting another fish, but I can't because that's the way it works with all species. Ugh, that's depressing.

Also, I'm considering throwing a party. I need to get creative and think of a theme of some sort. I really have no idea. We'll see. Hopefully I can do something awesome. A night to be remembered.

Okay, bed soon. Night all.