You're So Cute When Your Slurring Your Speech

It's close to 7.30pm. I haven't updated all day! That's so slack.

Anyway, I woke up at 11.30am, went straight to my aunty's to babysit (which was good fun), came home for a bit, went to my grandmother's for dinner, and just got home. My day has been packed. It's been okay though. I've eaten a fair amount, as expected on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays. I guess I just stop being so worried about it on a weekend.

Ugh, you know, there are 4 guys that I could go out with right now. Each I could organise a date with tomorrow, none of which know one another, all of which have asked me out. And becasue I am so afraid of love, I have turned each one down, some more than once. I was driving today, and I told myself to just say yes to the next one that asks. It's a nice idea, but it probably won't happen.

Secret #1: I was hurt really badly at the end of last year by a boy, whom I know hate with all of me. He goes to my uni. I hope with all of my heart that he disappears. I don't care what happens to him. I wont go into details, but basically, he verbally, physically and sexually assulted me over 14 months. He also cheated on me, and broke up with me. I was totally messed up for a while there. That's where this weightloss started. I was too sad to eat, I lost weight, I kept going. The end. Now I'm drugged up on 150mg of anti-depressants, and although it's six months later, I haven't gone a day without thinking about it once. It's sickening, but it's just how it is.

Anyway, over with the pity party. I don't know my calorie intake today (no more than 1000 cals), and I probably won't count over the weekend. I have some friends coming over for a movie night tomorrow, in which I plan on eating VERY little (it's easy to restrict when I have people around me), and not much else is on.

And, that's all I have to say for now.